– Are many of your friends addicts, or do they have serious emotional and social problems?
– As you were growing up, did you think it was up to you to keep the family functioning?
– As an adult, is it important for you to be thought of as the “dependable one”?
If you answered “yes” to a lot of these questions, you may indeed have a problem with co-dependency.
This does not mean that you are a flawed person.
It means that you are spending a lot of energy on other people and very little on yourself.
If it seems that a lot of your friendships are based on co-dependent rescuing behaviors, rather than on mutual liking and respect between equals, you may wish to step back and rethink your role in relationships.
If you suspect that your helping behavior is a form of co-dependency, a good therapist or counselor can help you gain perspective on your actions and learn a more balanced way of relating to others.
There are many excellent books available on the subject of co-dependency. Support groups such as Al-Anon can also help.